Grits and Yuppies

I love Grits, especially with spicy sausages, a little cheese and butter on it for breakfast. A lot of people did not grow up eating Grits and since the word doesn't sound very pretty, (grittiness?) and it is associated heavily with black people, it has become some kind of strange substance in the Non Grit Eating world.

Ok-- whatever it's their loss.

However I have a problem with Yuppies or other Non grit Eaters asking what is a Grit or what are Grits and scrunching up their faces as that ask-- as if to say I am asking but I don't really want to know because I have already formed a negative opinion about it.

I don't feel like explaining what a Grit is. You(Non Grit Eater) have spent most of your life not knowing what a Grit is maybe it is not for you to know.

Anyway, one day I was at the supermarket and these two Yuppie women got behind me in line. I had Grits and hair grease on the conveyor belt and I knew we were going to have some kind of interaction. My back was hurting, I was tired and not in the mood.

They were yapping away about their Yuppie interests, home remodeling projects, that new Albanian-Mongolian restaurant etc.....then there was a lull in the conversation.

I knew it--- here it comes.

Counting T minus 10..9..8..7..6..here it comes 5..4..3..2..1 we have lift off.

WHAT ARE GRITS?

First of all I don't know what Grits are and even if I did I would not take the time to explain it. I know I have that kind of Aunt Jemima look, overweight, middle aged and black, and I look like I should be singing in a choir and saying something like "Bless yo heart chil' you want to know what grits are, let's see sweety....."

That is not me. I may look Aunt Jemima-ish but if I met Aunt Jemima I would probably kick her ass or at least say "thanks" with a huge helping of sarcasm.

My acutal response to the question was "I don't know, I am buying this box for a friend."

They didn't like that--how dare I look like Aunt Jemima and have that attitude.

So they started talking amongst themselves, probably to save face " do you know what Grits are? No I don't have a clue", etc etc etc.

I just ignored them.














Then I felt bad, not for the rebuff but for the fact I didn't say what I really wanted to say. Next time I will respond with exactly what is on my mind.



Beware Yuppies and Non Grit Eaters, if you happen to be standing in line behind an overweight, middle aged black woman who is buying Grits, don't ask her what are Grits. Because if it is me this is the response you will get.


I don't know what Grits are and I don't know what a Grit is. I do know that they are delicious especially with saugage early in the morning. Here is an idea why don't you buy a box and make some. The directions are on the box. Put a little cheese and butter on it and eat it instead of hash browns or a bagel. You may find them delicious and I promise you will not turn black, you will not become a crack whore, your hair will not kink up and you will not have an irresistible urge to move to the hood and fool around with black men. However I cannot predict what your friends would say when they found out you were eating (gulp!) Grits.

There is nothing wrong with curiosity, but it is the phraseology and the face scrunching that I find extremely irritating.



Why not ask that question like this:

"you know I see that box of Grits all the time next to the Cream of Wheat-- it looks good, what does it taste like and what do you eat it with? I think I might like to try it one day."

If someone asked me like that, then I would be nice and maybe explain what I think Grits are because I really don't know, my mother used to make them when I was a child so I just ate and enjoyed.

However I do also recall my mother serving me Brains when I was a child and eating those with Grits. I thought they were some kind of egg dish spelled Branes, until I realized later in life they were really Brains, spelled Brains--- Brains from some animal--- I was really disgusted when I found that out.

So it is ok to scrunch up you face and ask me about Brains.